Brotherhood Lived Out – visiting Peter

Posted: 2012 03 29 by Chris Goforth in Authentic Man, Biblical manhood, Challenge, Discipleship, Hardcore Christian Men, manhood, masculine, masculinity, Relationship

I’ve been away because I was taking a vacation.  I needed some time to energize and get away.  I took a trip to Denver to visit my good friend Peter.  My time with him and his family was just what I needed.  While I was with him we were able to catch up and reminisced about our time together here in Portland.

Peter and his wife moved to Portland two weeks after they got married from the mid-west so Peter could attend Seminary.  The old house we all lived in had been converted into a duplex.  My family and I live in the upper half and Peter and his wife lived in the bottom part and we both shared the basement as storage space.

At that point in my life we had 4 kids and I wasn’t really outgoing towards our neighbors.  I kept to myself while my wife and kids built relationships with the neighbors.  Peter from the time he moved in was purposeful about connecting with folks and within a week of moving in found me one day while I was outside and asked if I would be interested in getting together and talking on a weekly basis.  I wasn’t sure what to make of this, it hit me off guard, and I told him I would think about it and get back to him.  The interesting part here is that about a month prior I had been talking with my wife and shared with her I had been praying and asking God to show me another guy I could connect with.  When I told her about our conversation, she said I should go for it as she remembered our conversation and said it seemed like a God thing.

I got back to Peter the following week and told him I would like to get together and hang out.  So the following week we walked over to a park near our house, sat down and both shared what we were looking for.  It was completely a God thing as we were both looking for something similar.  We both desired to have another guy in our life we could be real with, find encouragement, challenge one another and pray for one another.

When we left the church we were married in and were looking for a church Peter invited us to check out the one they were attending.  My wife and I were worried about having to check out a lot of churches to find the right one.  Thankfully our first visit was such a great visit, it became our home.  Peter and his wife bought a house in a different part of town and eventually we bought a house and moved to a much different part of town.  They left the church and eventually we left that church.  Peter switched jobs, schools and career choices.  For awhile he even moved away to go to school.  Later Peter and his wife started a family and we added on to ours.  Through all of those changes Peter and I continued to meet on a weekly basis (except for the year he went away to college – we talked on the phone weekly).

No matter what happened in our lives we were there for one another.  When we struggled, we were there to lift each other up in prayer.  We literally cried on each other’s shoulders.  We also celebrated successes, joys and seeing God work in our lives.  We never gave up on each other.  When the world was falling down around me and I was at my worst, I knew I could call or hang out with Peter and he would be there for me.

Peter had finished school and was looking for a job.  He’d been out of consistent work for a long time and needed something to come through so he could provide for his family.  We continually prayed for God to provide something.  I don’t know that I will ever forget that day in February 2011, when I got a call from Peter and he told me he had a job interview in Denver for a job he would love.  We prayed and a week later I got a call from him telling me he was moving to Denver in March to start his new job.  I was happy for him and yet at the same time, I knew what I had experienced for consistently for 5 years was ending.  Last March I helped him load up U-haul and said goodbye to the man who had changed my life and how brotherhood lived out looks.  As I write this, the pains are still there.

Getting to go and visit Peter and spend time with him was like jumping back into the rhythm of how it had been once before.  It was as if time hadn’t stopped.  We have continued to stay in contact with one another, but it was even sweeter to be in person together.

I will say Peter’s departure left a giant hole in my life. – I greatly desire finding another person to share life with in that manner.  I have looked and haven’t been able to find anyone as of yet.  I haven’t lost hope and know that if God answered my prayer then, he will again.  I also know that I what I find with another brother may in some aspects be similar but it will never be the same as it was with Peter.

God used Peter to bless my life in ways I never imagined.   Do you have someone like Peter in your life?  Have you been able to experience life with someone like Peter?

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