The acronym R.A.M. stands for Real Authentic Men.  These are men who choose to pursue manhood and masculinity with all their heart.  Men who do not fall into stereotypes, status quo or accept what society would define as a man.  These men are not willing to settle and just get by in life.  These men are willing to stand up and follow Jesus as the model of true masculinity.

If you believe no such thing exists than let this be a challenge your beliefs and ideas. Satan seeks to destroy men and in doing so erodes God’s plan and design for men. Many young boys grow up either having had a poor example or none at all.

These men really do exist. I have met them, I am one and I have friends who are. Daily we strive to be an example of Jesus to others.  In this day and age it’s a radical idea and yet all men are capable of attaining it. This kind is by no means easy, but the rewards are more than you can imagine. I believe these standards are for all men, not just a select few.

Over the course of the last 3 years; I have studied, prayed and sought out wise men to gain a better idea of what qualities real Godly men posses.  Below is the list God provided me with.  As my oldest son is entering his teens I put together a booklet based on what God gave me so we can work on a true model of masculinity.  I’ve shared this on my Blog as well as friends and found the responses to be affirming.  This is something men need. I believe once men know their purpose, how God designed them and what he has called us to be will significantly impact this world. It does not matter what you do – a janitor, garbage collector, CEO or even a President all men should strive to be real authentic men.

Below is a comprehensive list I will be addressing.  I will elaborate on each specific one, sharing stories from my life as well as using quotes and passages of scripture to encourage and drive the point home.

God first in everything
Servant Leadership
Hard Working
Justice not fairness
Emotional Control
Right Choices
Leads with love and destroys any parasites so they don’t take him away from the target
Knows what his calling/purpose in life is and follows it until God directs him otherwise.
Practices good health to live a long life

  1. Brian says:

    This is great stuff. I will be referring men to your blog quite often. Do you mind if I quote some of this post on my podcast?

    Keep up the great work. God’s Men need a resounding voice like yours.

    • Paul S says:

      Quote away. Make sure you check who wrote whatever you’re quoting so the right man gets credit. We love that we are reaching more and more men through this avenue and that we are building a teamwork situation with you guys. It’s often surprising to me how God makes things come together in an organic way.

  2. Bob Balkcom says:

    I have been on a similar journey the last 4 or 5 years. Have you talked with Robert Lewis, the founder of Men’s Fraternity, or Rick Caldwell at Fellowship Associates?

    I read “Raising a Modern Day Knight” by Lewis (recommend it if you have sons) and it led to Men’s Fraternity – because I didn’t get what I was learning to pass on to my sons.

    Thank you for doing what you’re doing. We need this!

    • I have not talked with Robert Lewis but I was introduced to him reading his book “Raising a Modern Day Knight” I have read that book over 10 times and I generally give it out as a gift to my friends when they have boys. It’s an excellent book and I highly recommend it. 2 years ago the church we attended was doing the Men’s Fraternity and I went through the series. It helped me solidify what God has already spoke to me. Thanks for your support and comments, appreciate it.

      • Bob Balkcom says:

        You’ll appreciate this…I’m planning my youngest son’s weekend right now. It’ll be this fall in the mountains with he, his older brother (who had his 5 years ago) and some incredibly godly men who have been instrumental in his life.

        Very good stuff.

        I met Robert Lewis a couple of years ago at a Men’s Fraternity conference in Little Rock. Was only able to talk with him a little more than to thank him for answering a call in his life. I do know they’re revamping the MF curriculum. They would be interested in hearing from someone with similar passion who is younger (Lewis is close to retirement, I would expect). They were looking to make the material (audio/video/print) more appealing to the younger guys coming up. Everyone loves Lewis, but he said there are new guys coming along all the time and eventually he’ll be looked at like “who’s that old guy?”!

      • Oh I am very excited to hear that. Good for you. I attempted to do this a year ago with my oldest son prior to him entering middle school. I had worked on it for a year prior and had gotten 6 other men to be involved in the process. As the date approached they all bailed on me. I was so incredibly hurt and angry.
        I had hoped and prayed it would work and I really wanted to do something like Robert had done in his book. Now I am planning something for this summer for just me and my son. It is important that we do these with our sons regardless if others are involved or not.
        I am excited to hear how it goes.
        Thanks for the information on Robert Lewis I will try to get in contact with him and see what’s going on.

      • Bob Balkcom says:

        Next time, ask them to read the book – get it for them, pass it around – something like that. Even if they’re marginal in commitment, they’ll be there to see what happens!

        Yes, good to get away with them – away from society, electronics, peer pressure, etc. So good to see the “real them” in those times.


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